by Alexa Joy Sherman and Nicole Tocantins
Ten Speed Press, 2004
Review by Dana Vigilante on Jan 29th 2006
I knew I was going to love this
book the minute to saw the leopard print cover. I read it from cover to cover in one night and all I can say is
that the authors have finally said what so many successful, single women have
been silently saying for years; "why buy the pig just to get a little
sausage"? Like it or not guys, the
tables (and the times), they are a changing.
No longer are women sitting at home waiting for the phone to ring. Gone
are the days when women adhered to the "five dates before sex"
rule. Today, we're having plenty of
good sex and we're having it on our terms, with no strings attached. Not only do we not want any strings attached
-- we want our bed buddies gone by the time we get out of the shower the next
As a successful thirty-eight year
old female who cancelled her own wedding due to cold feet, I could totally
relate to everything the authors wrote about.
Although I did love my fiancée I just couldn't see marrying him. To put it bluntly, did I really need to buy
the cow when I was getting the milk for free?
Here I am, single, successful and fiercely independent. I wasn't looking for the total commitment,
but boy was the sex great! Although,
the wedding was cancelled, we did continue to date exclusively for another year
and a half, but I finally woke up one day and realized that the great sex could
be coming from sources beside an ex-fiancée.
Sources who I didn't need to call every day or feel guilty kicking out
of my apartment at 6:00 a.m.
The authors talk about everything
from becoming "dicknotized" (developing feelings for your bed buddy
after having sex with him), to STD's.
Joining in the party is input from men.
Real men. Not eighteen year old
college students, but men in their thirties and forties who offer their honest
opinions regarding one-night stands, drunken sex and threesomes, among other
This book was an absolute joy to
read. Long overdue and brutally honest,
it sets straight the way women approach sex today. Reading this book is like sitting down with Carrie, Miranda,
Samantha and Charlotte for a good sex-talk fest.
2006 Dana Vigilante
Dana Vigilante is a hospice educator as well as an
advocate for proper end-of-life care and a certified bereavement group
facilitator. Currently writing a book based on interviews with terminally ill
hospice patients, she divides her time between New Jersey and San Francisco.