We are told, "You can have it
all!" Then when we have difficulties trying to have it all, we are then
told, "yes, but you must have balance". Lisa Belkin tells us that
you really can't have it all – at least not all at the same time. Life is made
up of choices. If you choose one thing, you generally must give up or postpone
another. Also, we definitely CAN'T be perfect, so let's stop trying to be and
ease up on ourselves a bit. Maybe, just maybe, it is better to enjoy life, our
children and our mates rather than having everything in our lives at least
appear to be perfect.
I am on the older end of the age
spectrum and I had already figured out what Belkin so wonderfully describes
in her book. I have already lived most of what she discusses. But this book
would be a fantastic enlightenment to those women who still believe the myth
and are still trying to live it. But worse, they continue to beat themselves
up because it doesn't work all of the time.
Belkin uses humor and she uses her
own life situation, as well as that of many of her readers in providing
examples of how we expect too much and get ourselves into trouble. This book
is a joy to read. Even though she is transferring some very important wisdom,
she does it in such a way that you laugh and cry as the "light goes on"
in your understanding.
So many of us have been enamored
with the "work ethic". I know I have always prided myself on giving
much more than the job requires. Before we have families, intense commitment
and devotion to work fit well with our lives and schedules. However, after
marriage and children we no longer have the same amount of time to devote to
work. Although we still have a passion for our work and love what we do, we
also have a passion for and love our families. So what is the answer? The
author shows us that there is not one single answer to the question, but many.
This book is well written and the
presentation is delightful. How often are we fortunate enough to have a really
good time while learning some extremely important lessons? I highly recommend
this book to everyone. It is enjoyable to read and I know you will find
yourself and your situation somewhere in the pages. More important, you may
learn to enjoy the life you have been given.
© 2003 Barbara Wright
Wright is a former Director of Human Resources with Master's Degrees in
Human Resource Planning and in Organizational Behavior. The last 15
years of experience have been in the
Telecommunications Industry. She has a wide variety of reading
interests and is a member of Reviews International Organization (RIO).